i miss you.....again.

i have a real bad tendency to mess things up.
but not just once. no.
over and over and over and over again.
this time i think it's too late.
i should have thought it through more.
i should have spent more time with him.
i just should have not done anything.

should of, would of, could of
didn't.

i'm not really sure where to go from here. it's happened too many times
and i don't know if i can get another chance to prove myself, and i dont know if i can move on.
not fully move on anyway.
i honestly think i've just missed my chance at love.
or maybe not.
i don't know...the only thing i do know is that i am only a fourteen year old girl.
and there is only so much i can take.
maybe something good will come this summer...
i hope so.
but right now, all i want is him.

i'm sorry.

"i've seen love die way too many times
when it deserved to be alive"

onto more possitive things, i ordered Grace's birthday present today :)
i'm not going to not say her name because she already knows, and i already know that she is reading this.
*waves*
hi Grace ;D

saturday is going to be amazingly good!

Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet
- Fall Out Boy

Mr. Sandman showing his beam
When he walks into the room the walls lean in to listen
Surf out, blank waves, click back and forth
Like old headlights, sniffing bottled glue again

Head like a steel trap, wish I didn't, I didn't
I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't,
I don't just want to be a footnote
In someone else's happiness

And does your husband know the way
That the sunshine gleams from your wedding band?
Does he know the way, does he know the way
Of the crickets that would convince me to call it a night?

I will never end up like him
Behind my back, I already am
Keep a calendar, this way you will always know

The last time you came through
Oh darling, I know what you're going through
The last time you came through
Oh darling, oh darling, oh darling

Tempest in a teacup, get unique
Peroxide Princess shine like shark teeth
It's a sign
(It's a sign)
It's a sign
(It's a sign)
It's a sign, what if you peaked early?

And does your husband know the way
That the sunshine gleams from your wedding band?
Does he know the way, does he know the way
Of the crickets that would convince me to call it a night?

Does he, does he know the way to worship our love?
And does your husband know the way
That the sunshine gleams from your wedding band?

But I will never end up like him
Behind my back, I already am
Keep a calendar, this way you will always know

The last time you came through
Oh darling, I know what you're going through
The last time you came through
Oh darling, oh darling, oh darling

Does your husband know? Does your husband know?
Does your husband know?
Does he know? Does he know? Does he know?

But I will never end up like him
Behind my back I already am
Keep a calendar, this way you will always know

Oh, the last time you came through
Oh darling, I know what you're going through
The last time you came through
Oh darling, I know what you're going through


i love that song so much, go listen to it kids, now.
i hope i feel better by the weekend, i probably will.
ah and i need to buy more special k.
but all i can say now is that,
if you ever get given a chance with love, take it.
you will regret it.
i have, i will, and i do.

i need to stop posting depressive blogs. aha.